I’m extremely resistant to treatment while manic

I’m extremely resistant to treatment and/or any suggestions on ways to regulate myself while manic. I enjoy it too much to want to do anything about it. I am so resistant that I left a message on my therapist’s voicemail saying I was never coming back, lol. Nah, none of the meds have done anything for me except give me a rash and/or diarrhea, talk therapy doesn’t do anything for me because I tend to resist talking about myself while there.

I find it helpful to write about here and elsewhere though. I mean to say, I feel better if I am able to express what’s going on with me and attempt to organize my thoughts. I also feel, even though I don’t think I would benefit much from further therapy at this time, that I have benefited from therapy somewhat in the past, if only in getting diagnoses and being able to research these things further.

Well, I spoke too soon. Stomach is still a bit picky. I went to my grandparents and they gave me a “hard root beer” which is like hard lemonade, but root beer. Then their neighbor came over with chocolate chip cookies and I ate one. Rushed home, spent quite some time in the bathroom feeling like I was dying.

Before that I was in a good mood though, and bouncing around the grandparents’ house cleaning and getting stuff for them.

I did also manage to stop at the dollar store, where I got more Gatorade and Powerade. and a cute little dancing skeleton.